Such is Life

Some interesting titbits of Australian knowledge to take with you to a rainy Australia day celebration.

From Australian bushranger to long-standing National icon, much of Ned Kelly’s life has been immortalised through Aussie culture. His passing words were “Such is Life.” This line was subsequently brought into modern day bogan culture through the medium of tattooing.

During a chapel service in 1832 about 300 female convicts at the Cascade Female Factory mooned the Governor of Tasmania. Apparently the ladies in the Governor’s party couldn’t control their laughter. An Australia Day celebration without a good old fashioned mooning, now that’s just un-Australian.

In 1954, Bob Hawke’s drinking skills were documented by the Guinness Book of Records. Sculling 2.5 pints of beer in 11 seconds it’s no wonder Bob later became the Prime Minister of Australia. During his run  as Prime Minister he stated: “Do you know why I have credibility? Because I don’t exude morality.” An ideal line to use when improvising a beer carton for a hat.

Another one of our politicians Sir John Robertson who was five time Premier of New South Wales drank a pint of rum every morning for 35 years. He was known to have said: ‘none of the men who have left footprints in this country have been cold water men.’

Swimming – In 1838 it was declared illegal to swim at public beaches during the day! This law was enforced until 1902.

Prime Minister Harold Holt went for a swim at Cheviot Beach, near Portsea on 17th December 1967, and was never seen again. The event has been referred to as ‘the swim that needed no towel’. Today it has become an Australian idium, “Doing the Harold Holt”

Stolen baby – On August 17, 1980, Lindy Chamberlain, the wife of a Church minister, told authorities that a dingo took her baby Azaria from their campsite near Uluru. Curiously, the Australian public was more inclined to place faith in the character of a wild dog rather than in a minister’s wife and as a consequence, Lindy was convicted of murder. Some years later, her conviction was quashed yet still, some Australians are adamant that the dingo was innocent.

Wishing everybody a dinky di, you beaut Australia day. May it be filled with:

  • At least one up close encounter with a new aged Bogan screaming incorrect lyrics to Cold Chisel. Note: Bogan criteria includes a naked torso proudly displaying tattoo’s of Ned Kelly, the Southern Cross, an Australian flag, or all three of the above. Modern bogan’s
  • An awkward blow up pool experience with a bunch of blokes wearing too small budgy smugglers.
  • Many a classic Australia day hat. We’ve all tried the carton, lets hope for something more experimental this year.
  • At least one person enjoying a plethora of food and booze whilst being paid for a day off yet still complaining about the so-called “cost of living.”

Can you feel the serenity………….

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